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Safiya
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| Statistics | | Normal | Inebriated |
| Babe Factor |    | 0 | - |
| Bitchiness | | 0 | - |
| Swilling Capacity | | 0 | - |
| Wit | | 0 | - |
| Unpredictability | | 0 | - |
| Deviousness | | 1000 | - |
| Bacon Points | | 93 | - |
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| Height: | 5' 3" |
| Weight: | Light as a fucking feather |
| Favorite Food: | Silent Sausage |
| Favorite Implement of Destruction: | A sharp toungue behind a sweet smile. |
| Quote: | "Let me refill your mug!" |
| Nickname: | Stay-c-poo |
| Bio: | |
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